Thursday, July 28, 2005

Bad Times, Good Spirits

Umr jalwon mein basar ho, yeh zaroori to nahin
Har shab-e-gam ki seher ho, yeh zaroori to nahin

This must have been on the minds of my colleagues from office who stayed at the corporate house for the second consecutive night, been away from their families for 36 hours by then. After all, not on all days can one be with family. And some nights, especially second in a row, with uncertainty looming large, is shab-e-gam after all, and expecting a sunny morning (seher), even literally, would be expecting too much.

The gam ranged from a submerged car to a four-year-old who wanted mamma to come home (in Kandivilli, from Colaba) by "aeroplane", if bus, car, and train are not running. Then there was this lady who was planning for her mother's birthday for days, and all that she could do was to call her up using a cell phone with an ever-wavering signal. So much for planning. Life is a typical project, planning to plant apples, red and delicious, and end up eating mushroom, poisonous at times. Yes, you can always add peas to the mushroom, if you are north-Indian, but c'mon, expecting peas to taste like apples, is weird even by Jaat (Gurgaon Police) standards.

Of course, gam, like mushrooms also comes in several varieties, from missing mom's birthday (Rachita), to trying to breathe under earth after a landslide has hit you (an old woman in Saki Naka), to going hungry for 36 hours straight (Ghushe), to walking through 5 feet water (Neha), to spending two nights in office (Doctor), to still having a wild shrub for hair (me), Fructis notwithstanding.

We decided to have the second evening in the Corporate House livelier than the previous one. Pardon me, we did not decide to, some odd beast, called Torrential Rains, and the instinct of not letting the beast dampen our spirits, forced us to. You can wet a Mumbaikar's body, but you can't dampen his spirit. After all you are no more than some menacing H2O. That doesn't even sound scary. You can strand our lives, but not keep them from playing Dumb Charades. And that is what we did. Everyone seemed to understand...

Neend to dard ke bistar pe bhi aa sakti hai
Unki aagosh mein sar ho yeh zaroori to nahin

After all, when the mother and the four-year-old embrace (aagosh), all will be mended, and mended damn well. Meanwhile, research is on about correct way of embracing such that lack of a Colaba - Kandivilli flight can be properly put to perspective.

While one Dumb after the other took centre stage, prayers must have been on in everyone's minds. No silly, the movie names were not that tough that you need pray to get them right.

Prayers for him/her, prayers for his/hers, prayers for theirs, prayers for ours. Sab ke liye sajde

Shaikh karta to hai masjid mein Khuda ko sajde
Uske sajdon mein asar ho, yeh zaroori to nahin

As fresh rain knocked at the window pane, weariness and helplessness flashed many a face. One of those moments when the question that you've been avoiding for a while now, "Does God exist?" needs a revisit. From the funny, "Is there a complaint redressel register up there?" to the more mundane, "Am I going home tomorrow?", the effectiveness of the prayers was yet to be seen.

Earlier in the day, I had walked down to the Marine Drive near NCPA, to dump some of my weariness. What I saw is probably what is called the Mumbai Spirit. Each face, young or old, braids or bald, pretty or otherwise, grateful-but-not-showing townie or stranded-but-so-what suburban, had a lets-live-it-now, a we'll-meet-tomorrow-when-it-comes, look. In fact, it was so cheering that I too decided to go right till the far end and sit on those crab laden tripod shaped cement rocks. Let's live it now, we'll meet the crabs tomorrow.

On my way back I saw an old man, rich and apparent, white kurta pyjama, folded hands, bare feet as in a temple, looking at the sea, probably calling his God (Saaki). It could very well be a this-year-an-eighty-percent-on-my-stocks-please thing, but praying he was...

Sabki nazaron mein ho Saaki, yeh zaroori hai

... and so were people at the corporate house.

Sabki nazaron mein ho Saaki, yeh zaroori hai magar
Sab pe Saaki ki nazar ho yeh zaroori to nahin

My colleagues did end up going back to their houses this afternoon, almost after 50 hours.

While the industry and the economy mourn a Rs. 1000 crore loss, I'd be glad to know if the old rich man gets his eighty percent.

Sab pe Saaki ki nazar ho yeh zaroori to nahin

Dear Saaki, my expectations are only sixty percent, kindly oblige. I know you're overworked. You've just been to Mumbai, after an unexpected break.

Ah, when the Gods ensured that it won't be a dry day, we could do nothing but follow suit. So wine did keep us Dumbs happy. The toast was: "Bad Times, Good Spirits". Literally.

Tuesday, July 26, 2005

Maximum City

Its 5:30 a.m. and I just came back after seeing Mumbai. No, I wasn't out partying, wasn't even working late.

I saw Mumbai, a city paralyzed. Jammed roads, Intimidating sea, Halted trains, Dysfunctional phones, Blacked-out suburbs.

Around afternoon, it started getting *quite* dark. But ever since I installed Konfbulator and its nifty little widget for weather, and configured it for Mumbai, looking outside the window has become a passé. The widget punchline itself says, "So that you never have to look outside again".

So, anyway, the widget showed cloudy sky with those gray streaks, so large that they seemed to run across the section on the widget for the current date. I didn't quite bother interpreting what it could mean, a torn city, perhaps. As I said, I didn't bother.

As the day progressed, the commotion (excitement?) in the office increased. Things like, "...you live in Colaba (close to the office, that is), why would you bother...” For me what was strange was to find this particular boat in the sea, that one sees from the window near the elevators on the floor where my office is, missing. I distinctly remember seeing it twice in the day, once about 2 PM and then about 4 PM, during my excursions. But at about 5:30, the boat was no where to be found. Either they took it, or *it* did.

By about 6 it was sort of "... (Houston) we have a situation!” Pizzas were ordered, and I was prepared to welcome guests from the office to the Corporate House, where I stay. If it is to be, it will be, so it was.

I finished my work at about 11. By then the ladies from the office had left for the CH, while we were, seven of us, unfair sex (each unfair than the other), in the office, no where to go, no place to call our own. So went the usual trip, and Ghazals plus Google earth kept us just fine.

Ah, not to forget, the little office-alone adventure that happened in the suite adjacent to ours. Apparently, a man had gotten drunk and somehow got himself locked in the office. So helpless, and stupid, as he was, and selfless, and jobless as people in my office were, a good amount of time went in setting the drunkards (actually there were two, too drunk) free.

How stupid the drunkards were, we'll never know. But we were *quite* jobless, so at 4 we decided to "checkout" (I hate ambiguous words, I do) the sea @ Marine Drive. So intrepid as we were, went down towards NCPA only to make fun of the sissy sea (we had expected more aggression) and the umbrella-holders amongst us. Frankly, I didn't think the sea was sissy, a little more and I wouldn't have been writing this!

As in other mundane and boring stories, hunger set in. Only that it was for food this time. So we went to Churchgate. And boy, it was one of those days when I think not owning a digicam is the second biggest mistake of my life. The first one being turning 24 and comfortably forgetting to plan a life strategy, but then, that’s a different story, perhaps a different blog entry.

Churchgate! That place didn't have church, and not even a gate, but yes it had .... It had people. People. People. Some more, people. And some more. And some more. Sleeping; on the floor, with or without newspaper ("mattress"); on the benches; in the parked trains. Watching; life, universe, and everything. Wondering; when are the trains going to start, if their families are safe and fed, if office tomorrow will understand, how long will they discuss their i-was-at-foobar-when-we-got-stuck stories with friends at work, whose story would become most popular, and if all 24 year olds have a life strategy. Okay, I made the last one up. In fact, I made all of them up.

Then there were the ones who believed more in the power of screaming, than sleeping. So merrily, they were making the lives of the authorities miserable, by enquiring about the time the trains were supposed to restart. It amuses me to be among the few who understand that rains are still the work of an external force. By the way, why not take this golden opportunity to blame it on Pakistan?

Anyway, as any aspiring entrepreneur would sense, I wondered about the existence of an amazing business opportunity, given the sheer number of potential customers with a need. Food. As with any other mundane and boring story, the hunger sets in, remember? And the story of all our lives is mundane and boring, let’s face it.

As with most "innovative" ideas, this one too was doomed for failure. This is Mumbai, my friend, a city that has the cash-upon-an-opportunity-and-cash-it-now attitude even among the house flies. Soon I discovered a bun-butter-jam vendor and a make-and-shift-if-you-don't-shift-then-BMC-will tea stall around the place. And, they were doing brisk business. Its 4:30 in the night and we're talking about a literally rainy setup. Thou shalt strive to maximize end-user comfort and make money in the process. And thou shalt soon change thou damned name. T-h-o-u is archaic!

Cut to search for smoke (one of my colleagues wanted it bad enough, in fact, the smokers always want it bad enough), and Regal cinema was the place where one always finds cigarettes, pan, tea, biscuits, chocolates, and happiness. Okay, I lied about the happiness part.

Striking thing about all these we're-open-24-7-365 shops is the absence of ridiculous inflation, when the consumer need becomes greater than usual. So we got all the stuff from each of the vendors at the normal rates. Very unlike in northern parts of the country, Homo Sapienus Fleeceus!

On our way back, we tuned into one enterprising FM channel which, in its endeavor to comfort the denizens, was up much beyond the normal time. They were taking calls from people stranded across the city and making announcements informing the families of those stuck, about the well being of those who couldn't be with their families that night, motivating people to send food to some 250 kids stuck in a building in Goregaon that’s flooded 10 feet, and so on.

Nobility, I think is a much undervalued virtue. And comforting those in need is fairly, and affordably, noble.

Here are my 2 cents and several bytes (see above, if you haven't already) for the cause.
Move 'Maximum City' Mumbai, tomorrow is another day, and I have to go to the office. Its 5:30 no more, damn!

Wednesday, July 20, 2005

They Are Therefore I Am

Hi Mummy and Papa,

If you consider your kids to be the greatest "milestone" from the glorious 25 years that you have spent together, let me just say that you have been extremely successful in attaining the milestone. Twenty-five of the many reasons are:

1. Both of your kids couldn't have been happier being born to a different set of parents.
2. Both of your kids cannot be more thankful of their upbringing.
3. Both of your kids have seen you through thick and thin.
4. Both of your kids have admired you every single day of their lives.
5. Both of your kids feel safe in the world that you have provided to them.
6. Both of your kids look forward to you in times of distress.
7. Both of your kids want to be with you in times of their joy.
8. Both of your kids attribute every single thing they have attained to you.
9. Both of your kids moved on, when things seemed rough, only because of you.
10. Both of your kids have their dreams that they have because of you.
11. Both of your kids immensely appreciate the devotion that both of you have towards our little sweet home.
12. Both of your kids learn from you that one can never lose by working hard.
13. Both of your kids are humble because of you.
14. Both of your kids are motivated to attain higher because of you.
15. Both of your kids need no feel for external support because of the pillars that both of you have always been .
16. Both of your kids feel accountability only to you and no one else.
17. Both of your kids seek comfort from you and no one else.
18. Both of your kids carry your values.
19. Both of your kids are what they are because of you.
20. Both of your kids will be what they will be because of you.
21. Both of your kids rejoice the small pleasures in life because of your naivete.
22. Both of your kids have big dreams in life because of your sophistication.
23. Both of your kids are weak when you are weak.
24. Both of your kids are strong when you are strong.
25. Both your kids love you the way you are.

Thank you mummy and papa, you are the greatest! Have a great silver jubilee party!

All of our love,
Shivali and Rahul

Sunday, July 17, 2005

Eric Von Daniken and Google Maps

The register reports about a certain impression, they claim to be of Jesus Christ, in a Peruvian sand dune http://www.theregister.co.uk/2005/07/15/google_spots_jesus/

Well, for me it is only reminiscent of the theory in Eric Von Daniken's (http://www.world-mysteries.com/pex_3.htm) book titled, "Chariots of the Gods". I bought this book around the time I came to Mumbai this Feb. The most interesting aspect of this theory and thus the book was its concurrence with what I was discussing with Kabra in our trip to Shivpuri (The exact location where we discussed this is in the accompanying picture).



One of the things we discussed was our (at least mine) disbelief at accepting that in the billions of years since the earth formed, we (our race, our ancestors) are the most advanced/developed beings than existed. Alright, the veracity of earth's age is also debatable, since we depend on calculations as to earth's age done by our "edition" of earth dwellers.
Cut to Mumbai, and I am set thinking about it again while reading Von Daniken's book.
Cut to the register article, I'm thinking again. Sorry, I meant I'm blogging again!
Adding the other Von Daniken books to the wishlist now...